A BIRTH AT HOME
by Aricia E. LaFrance, MSE

My husband and I decided to have our second baby at home. When we informed friends about our decision, they all had concerns about my physical health and our collective sanity. All, that is, except for friends who had themselves birthed at home. They reported peaceful, intimate experiences and told us they’d never do it any other way.

We love our medical doctor, and our hospital has been great for everything from stitches to surgery, but I wasn’t sick. I was pregnant. So we interviewed midwives and our experience was extraordinary. We drank tea as we spoke and didn’t feel rushed. After speaking with five different people, we chose Ursula Hessdorfer and sat with her two hours to discuss the baby and what type of birth we wanted. During the physical examination, she spoke respectfully with me and also talked to the baby. It made me feel she really valued this little life – he wasn’t just a number to her.

The experience was empowering from the very start. I was taught to trust my body and my instincts. Ursula took about an hour with us at each appointment. Our questions were answered respectfully. Our concerns were calmed by reasonable, detailed answers. Late one night, the baby was moving a lot and then stopped. I called Ursula in a panic, and she immediately set our minds at ease by saying, "I’ll be right over so you can hear the baby’s heartbeat." She came over and stayed until she made sure we were okay emotionally as well as physically.

When it came time for the birth, we felt relaxed and prepared. I called Ursula when labor started at 5 am but asked her to wait to come over. We knew what to expect and what possible complications we faced, as well as how those complications would be handled.

We called Ursula when the contractions became stronger and she joined us. I asked Ursula if it was all right to eat something, and she told me to go ahead and eat if I was hungry – again telling me to trust my body. I wasn’t medicated at all, but Ursula had a bag of tricks to help me deal with the pain. I sat in the tub and she had my husband pour water over my stomach to distract me from the pain. I felt very secure. Ursula was there when we needed her, but she let my husband and me have this incredible experience together – privately, peacefully, and joyfully.

As the birth got closer, Ursula called her partner – another midwife - to help out. Ursula worked with me and Jeni worked with the baby. The baby wasn’t whisked away for an exam. Jeni checked Scottie over, and then led my husband through weighing and measuring him. Only a few minutes after his birth, Scottie was put on my chest and started breast feeding.

We were pleasantly surprised that the midwives stayed with us for about three hours after the birth. They helped us clean-up, made sure I had something to eat, and that we were all doing well. The baby never left my side that night. The experience was joyful beyond words. In a surge of confidence and peace, I felt connected to all other women who have trusted their bodies and birthed at home.

Aricia LaFrance is the mother of two boys and a psychotherapist currently running the non-profit organization, The Angel Project